Communication in Groups and Organizations

I was hoping for a better definition of the modesty norm. I understand it is some sort of a social dilemma. "on one hand, we usually want other people to perceive us as positively as possible, but on the other hand, self-presentational norms require that we not be too self-aggrandizing." What do we have to do in order to not violate this norm? What kinds of situations determine our interpretation of this norm? Does the balance change?